Jaclyn Hill x Morphe

Jaclyn Hill x Morphe

Hi everyone!

So about 3 months ago, I decided to treat myself. And when I say treat, I really mean treat. I picked up the amazing Jaclyn Hill x Morphe palette!

I have been using it ever since my purchase and I can honestly say it is one of the best products I have ever bought myself, and also THE MOST expensive…But I like to think that it is worth every penny.

I got it from Beauty Bay and luckily I got the delivery for free, which is always a bonus. Additionally, it arrived really quickly which I was so happy about.

I’m sure all of you have already heard about the goods and the bads of the product, but if not, I will give a quick breakdown on my opinion of it.

PROS:

  • it is so unbelievably pigmented, especially the shimmery shadows
  • it has such a variety of colours, everything you need actually
  • there are a lot of transition shades, one to suit every skin colour which I ind is amazing as it is so inclusive
  • there are also pops of colours if you’re feeling brave, such as the blues/ purples
  • Not much fall-out at al
  • Eye shadow lasts a very long time
  • Quite a lot of product to last for a long time

Okay, so that was much more PROS than I had anticipated for. You can tell that I am blown away by his palette and I am so happy with this purchase. But now, onto the CONS.

CONS:

  • Can be some creasing if eyelid is set properly
  • Maybe a litttle bit on the pricey side- but I feel like it is worth the investment if you feel like you’ll get good use from it
  • Matte shades aren’t as pigmented as the shimmers, yet still are very good.

So as you can see, I feel like this palette is worth the hype. It has been my go-to for the everyday neutral look to the full-out Wedding looks. It really can cater for all looks. I just wish it had a purple in there. But overall, I am really proud of Jaclyn Hill. She has been so inclusive in terms of matching shades for a range of skin colours.

Recommend: 9.8/10

If you would like to purchase, click here.

Morphe Morphe x Jaclyn Hill Eyeshadow Palette
Retail price: £37.00

Till next time x

Read about my story on balancing university with part time work by clicking here!

 

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My Foundation Routine: Autumn Edition

My Foundation Routine: Autumn Edition

So it is Autumn! Aaaaay my our favourite season ever!download (1)

It’s the season of Halloween (not that I celebrate it, but the vibe is so cool), the crunchy leaves on the streets, the picturesque moments, the beautiful colour of orange appearing everywhere, the shorter days, longer evenings, cosy nights, fairy lights and candles, season of jumpers, of layering clothes, of wearing cool boots, wearing “Fall” makeup, of Christmas approaching (not that I celebrate this either but again, I love the vibe) of basically feeling so cosy and wonderful and mmmmm everything.

Actually, throwback, I used to hate this time of year before as I was paranoid of scary people in the streets. I always feared for my dad’s safety whilst he was leaving to work in the dark since I thought the bad people would attack him. I was literally terrified! LOL.

download (2)

My foundation routine:

  1. Pro filt’r Fenty Beauty Foundation in 370 dotted around
    my face
  2. With Maybelliene Fit Me Foundation in a much lighter colour dotted alongside the Fenty
  3. Dampen a beauty sponge (mine is the Real Techniques one)
  4. Use the flat side
  5. and dab dab dab

As I bought the Fenty Foundation whilst I still had my summer tan on, the colour is really dark for me right now. It is also too red- toned for me, my fault for not checking that properly. Therefore, I mix this with my mum’s foundation which is MUCH  lighter and has a yellow-tone instead. This gives me the perfect colour match and it looks beautiful together.

On the verge of death?

On the verge of death?

HELLO WORLD!

Ugh how I’ve missed this… just to forget about school for some time.

These past two weeks have probably been the most stressful weeks of my LIFE. That’s a huge statement to make but believe me I am not even exaggerating, it could probably even be an understatement.

As you may or may not be aware, this is my final year of school. After this… I will be in Uni (that is if I don’t fail). So it is the most intense year so far. The past two weeks were AP3 week, Assessment Point 3. It is the final mocks in school before the REAL ONES. IT’S ALL SO REAL AND I’M PETRIFIED. What if I fail? Would I be held back a year? Will I go through clearing? Would I be able to get into a Uni? 

I am so exhausted. I actually handled the exams pretty well for the first week where I was surprisingly on top of everything, I did have little breakdowns here and there, but that’s expected. I was actually on some level, enjoying it. It was different to only having lessons, and I couldn’t wait to get my feedback. But then the second week comes around and I’m telling you, I cant seem to keep my eyes open. It’s just the feeling of “yes, I’ve done his week, I can now relax. Wait what do you mean there’s another week of exams and revision and early mornings and days of endless fatigue and and… I can’t do it”. I was especially more anxious as I would have 2 biology exams, which are the hardest ones.

This week consisted of me doing my exam, eating, talking with friends, going home, falling asleep for 1 hour, waking up drowsy to do more work, eating dinner late, praying, sleeping, waking up at 6 am to go over more content, feeling sleepy and REPEAT.

But, alhamdulillah, I am done for AP3. Ready for the real exams?….no. But insha’allah will get there.

So this was just a really random rant of me siting here and vomiting out my emotions and misery. It will be interesting for me to read back through this later. Sorry for the melancholy tone- is just my life now I guess. *Insert some depressing music*

But roll on the Easter Holiday!

x Tahmin

Boxing Day purchases

Boxing Day purchases

Hello again!

So today is the 29th of December and I am doing a blogpost. This only means one thing- yep, its a Boxing Day Haul!

Overall I am so pleased with my purchases, definitely better than the Black Friday mahogany. I bought many tops for school as well as a sleeveless coat, shoes and some accessories. But the day didn’t start off so well as I accidentally overslept, I know, the worst day to possibly do this. Actually maybe after oversleeping for something like an exam, which I hope never happens to me! But anyways I still went to Kensington High Street and found that products were still there. I went into New Look only, as the other shops weren’t as good for the sale.

These are all the products I bought:

Regain that moisture

Regain that moisture

Hi guys I am back! See, I am getting the hang of this!

So these products are my recent faves to wear at night. I have a mini review under each.

So this is the Garnier Night Care cream which is actually one of the best creams I’ve used so far. It adds so much moisture to the face overnight and makes makeup application much easier. It also smells really fresh, I’m not sure what it is, but it’s pretty good. Recommend 9/10 (especially for people with dry/normal skin)

I also have began to use Naturally Radiant and let em tell you- it smells divine! It has a different texture to the previous one, it is more thick but once its massaged in you can hardly tell it’s there which is always a bonus. The only thing is that I’m not entirely sure how its improving my skin condition but I’ll have to get back to you on that.

Recommend: 8.5/10

I will continue to use these two as so far they’ve improved my dry skin (especially useful for the winter!). And will talk to you all very soon xx

Life Update

Life Update

So the last time I wrote here was when I got my nose pierced- 4 months ago. Which is craaazy of me. But hey, just to let you know, my piercing is now infection-free! HOORAY Honestly it was one of the most stressful times of my life. The infection caused my nose to literally have a giant swell on one side causing fluid to constantly come out. It definitely didn’t help my self esteem. In school, I was continuously self conscious of someone just watching my nose. But now that it’s all cleared up, I definitely feel happier and more confident!

OOOH another update, I met my all time favorite band ever! Little Mix!! I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned my love for them, which is weird. I absolutely adore every single one of them, their personalities just go so well together- you have to watch some of their interviews on YouTube, they are hilarious! I met them with my friend Asma (who is a Mixer) at their book signing in London. This was so unexpected as I didn’t even think my mum would let me go. But I guess as it wasn’t a concert or anything that I was allowed. Whilst in the queue, we also met a crazed fan who is now still in contact as well as so many other people. It was crazy- my first time being somewhere where I got to connect to people in a strange way. Yup, we all began singing ;literally every single Little Mix song we could remember from the top of our lungs (just to make sure they could hear us). When I actually got to meet them face to face however, that’s when suddenly all the words began to leave my brain. I was literally speechless. However I did get a chance to actually have a conversation with Jesy, who complimented my makeup!!!!! Still cannot get over it, Definitely a day to remember. 22nd October 2016.

Another thing I can remember is that I have sent off my UCAS application! As I’m now in year 13, the final year of school, I have had to apply to Universities. I decided to apply for Sociology to a range of Unis in London. I actually have heard from 2, but yet to for the rest. In’sha’allah when I have a final decision for one Uni to go to, I will talk about it all on a separate blogpost. I just hope I am able to do things I wish to in the future. In’sha’allah.

Wooow this has suddenly turned into a massive post of me blabbering my life away in 3 paragraphs. Whoever is reading this- I hope you have/ had a lovely day! x

 

Sleek lovin’

Sleek lovin’

 

I recently went down to Superdrug once more, as I do every week! This time I especially went to utilise the 2 for £10 special- which is amazing since many Sleek products are around £10 anyways. I bought LOVELYYYYY ITEMS so here is a little haul! *A review will be up soon*

IMG_3963This is the beautiful Sleek eyeshadow palette in ‘Enchanted Forest’. As I have many neutral shades which are mainly gold/champagne colours, I wanted to go for something a bit different. As you can see this has more darker plum colours with cool-toned blues as well. I can’t wait to actually wear this out, it’ll look amazing. Unfortunately the colours didn’t match my Eid dress. But I have another palette which does- do tell me if you’d like a haul of all of my eyeshadow palettes!

I also picked up the Sleek cream contour palette in Dark. It’s a new product for Sleek and I saw many people purchase it, so I thought I’d give it a go. I’ve also wanted a contour with high pigmentation for Eid as I really want to go for the chiselled face-look this year. I hope this palette will allow me to accomplish this!

So that is all I’ve ought from Sleek!

My next posts will be:

  • review on the mentioned Sleek items
  • NYX Soft Matte Lip Creams haul
  • Eid GRWM Special!
Drugstore Bargain Haul ♥

Drugstore Bargain Haul ♥

♥Hey everyone! I’m back with yet again another Superdrug haul, but this time with a bonus product from Primark! So get comfy, grab some tea whilst I go through all the products. Quick note to add – Superdrug are currently having a 3 for 2 offer across ALL cosmetics with a free makeup bag so do go and treat yourself while this lasts!

  • Master Sculpt contour kit by Maybelline: I have been dying to get my hands on this as I’ve heard many good reviews as well as the YouTuber Sebinaah mentioning this in so many videos. So I’ve already tried it out and it is just so good. The contour side is really pigmented and it also comes with a handy highlight. There is also a little sculpting brush- so useful for travelling. 9/10
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  • Real Techniques miracle complexion sponge: Again I have been wanting this for just so long. But I never actually bought it, until I saw this offer LOL. I’v heard that if you dampen the sponge then it can make your base really dewy- that’s exactly what I want. Ill definitely try this out and write a review soon saying whether I prefer the real techniques buffing brush or this.
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  • Rimmel London Match Perfection foundation: OK so I have picked up another foundation, this time a less super glittery one like the Wake me up foundation! But I wanted one with a bit more coverage, specifically for Eid which is so close. I’m really excited to get super decked up for Eid- as you may know- us Asians go fully decked up for this occasion.
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  • PS lip liner: I’ve heard many good things about Primark’s lip liners which recently came out, and they’re only for £1. There’s no going wrong in that! So I’ve picked up a very dark bown/purple shade. I also want to review this soon, I don’t want to have high expectations  as it is only a pound..but who knows.

If you would like to read my personal reviews on either the lip liner or Real techniques sponge, look out for the reviews some time next week! Thank you for reading this little post xx Tahmin

You can view the products below 🙂

Master Sculpt contour kit  – £6.99

Real techniques miracle complexion sponge – £5.99

Rimmel London Match Perfection foundation – £7.99

PS lip liner – £1

Zoella Review

Zoella Review

So I know all the Zoella fan lovers are head over heels for these products. Plus being a loyal subscriber of her myself, I just had to buy some of her products to try them out- they’re also very pretty!

But I didn’t want to have a bias opinion when using these, I wanted to be objective. Therefore I pretended that these were not Zoella’s products. I think this really helped as it allowed me to have an honest opinion.

First off, the packaging of all the products are just sooo cute! They really do look amazing in pictures and on any furniture. Hence I was impressed with that. Starting off with the Zoella Hand Cream, my first impression were that it is very big. I didn’t know if this was good or bad, so I tested it out on my hand. I have to say that the smell is gorgeous and dries on your hand very quickly. However, it does dry off quite quickly so you have to keep topping up- this is the only down side.

Next is the fragranced body mist in ‘Lets Spritz’. And OH MY GOSH, I think everyone has to agree that it looks amazing! It has an elegant vibe to it so it doesn’t look childish. I don’t have much bad sides to say about this except that the fragrance does go after about 30 minutes or so. But the smell is so nice and the product disperses over skin very softly.

The last thing is the Zoella Fizz Bar. This has again a beautiful aroma which surprisingly does last in the bath. But I have to mention that in order to break up the pieces, it requires a lot of strength. This is especially annoying for me as…well, I’m not the strongest out there, so it takes a lot to break one cube. I’m serious. It’s embarrassing. To add, it is mainly young girls who use this, hence it should be much easier to break. Overall though it was a good price considering the amount that comes along.

To conclude, I think Zoella products have a prominent advantage- their smell. Its so good! But there are little things that let them down. I also think that some products are over-priced, especially considering the fact that young teenage girls mainly buy these. So I think after I use these products up, I will re-stock on the fragrance and body lotion.

These are the items I’ve mentioned:

spray
Lets Spritz Body Mist – £8
fgbfg
Candy Cream Body Lotion – £5

 

fizz
Zoella Fizz Bar – £5

 

 

 

Balancing part- time work with uni work

Balancing part- time work with uni work

Hey everybody, thanks for coming to read this blog post.

I have been studying whilst also having a part-time job for quite some time now. I feel like I have found both the advantage of doing this but most importantly, I have experienced the disadvantages as well.

I first started work during the summer holidays and so I didn’t feel the effects of course. I just went to work, came home, chilled, had some fun day outs then went to work again. It was all good and swell. However, I then started University in October…

My first job whilst studying was pretty good for a student, I think. The times and days you could work were really flexible; I could easily ask them to change my shift or swap it with someone if need be. I even went to work in the evening every Monday and Fridays after work for 3 hours just to earn a bit more of the £££. Therefore, whilst working here, I didn’t feel the effects.

This was until I started my new part time job with a new company. I will list the pros and cons of having a part time job whilst also being a student:

PROS:

  • make friends
  • takes your mind off studying for a couple of hours
  • more experience to list on your CV

CONS:

  • Travelling to and fro (especially for my work place which can take from 40 mins to an hour) wastes precious revision time
  • being tired, stopping me from doing work
  • more money spent on food and travel LOL 😦

Overall, working isn’t that bad whilst studying. It can be a bit draining and a time-waster at some points. But I do think that choosing a suitable job is important. Some things to keep in mind are choosing to do a wise amount of hours, not too much, the location shouldn’t be too far, should be quite easy work.

Till next time,

Tahmin x

Have a read about my favourite foundation by clicking here

Serious chats

Serious chats

I’ve been feeling super duper emotional lately. Actually do you know what, it hasn’t just been ‘lately’ this has been a recurrence throughout my entire life. It has just hit me again- all the stress, depression, dare I say harmful thoughts and a plummet of self-confidence.

I have never, ever talked about this to anyone, I’ve tried to tell my cousin, even my sister, but it didn’t ever come out right. They haven’t been able to understand the full extent to what I have flet. And I thing that is a real flaw I hold- I’m not very articulate, good with words. So I have trouble speaking to people and getting them to understand me. Maybe I’m just better at writing down my emotions. Yet, even so I think I struggle to get my point across.

Tonight has just been one of the worst nights in a very long time. I feel really down and upset. All my insecurities have all jumped onto me all at once.

For the past year and a bit, I have really improved my confidence issues – it actually improved massively. I felt so happy and content with my friendship group in school, I was really confident in education as well as with my growth as a person in terms of personality, intelligence and for the first time ever, my appearance. I really had the best year. It was such a change, although I am aware of my past self, I tried my best to forget it and bury it as deep as possible. We all have the odd bad days where something annoys us and negative memories start to rush back, but I trained myself on preventing the thoughts and memories from coming back. I did so well, now that I think about it.

Yet this year, well actually today, I feel like all of the burying has lost all its power. That sounded really poetic but I really mean it. I feel like all of it has caught up with me and has literally slapped me across the face. Today, a small, petty argument has brought everything back and I just can’t help but feel so weak. Just like I did those years ago when I felt so low all of the time. I don’t think anyone who knows me personally knows that I felt like that at the time. I was and still am such a good actor- I can easily hide my emotions. There was only one teacher at school actually who suspected I was depressed but I got so embarrassed and claimed that that was nonsense. But actually, a small part of me was quite happy someone finally noticed through all the fake smiles. It made me feel a little less lonely, I guess.

I’m not writing this for anyone to feel pity for me, I just decided to sit down and write everything that’s going through my mind right now, because I feel like this will help me reach a clear head at the end.

To be honest, I was and actually still am not quite sure what it was that made me have such terrible thoughts. I used to think that I’m just weird. Because I seemed to have such a great life; a mum and dad, sisters, a warm home. And people who actually felt the same emotions I did had it much, much worse than me so I just didn’t understand. I still don’t. Maybe it was all the things going wrong in my life, all of my insecurities and so on.

I really don’t know where I’m going with this. I just want these insecurities to leave. I well up again as I’m writing this since I feel quite sure that that will never happen. They just stick by me, no matter how much I grow. And because of this, I constantly doubt the future.

Fenty Beauty Foundation!

Fenty Beauty Foundation!

Hey guys.

So I’ve hopped onto the bandwagon and straight away bought the Fenty Beauty Foundation, or…the Pro Filt’r Soft Matte Longwear Foundation.

My Review

Pros:

  • It leaves a matte finish but is still dewy and looks like skin
  • The coverage claims to be medium to full coverage and I agree with that
  • The coverage is also buildable
  • The foundation lasts a long time
  • Other face makeup glides on top really well
  • Packaging is reall cute!
  • Rihanna gave an extra 2 mls!

Cons:

  • Colour match is wayyyyy off (The MUA gave me a darker colour)
  • Foundation does come off when with contact- must set thoroughly
  • It does oxidise a lot!

Recommendation:

8/10

Overall I do really like this Foundation, and would recommend it to others. If I were to get it again, I’d definitely make sure it’s the right shade for me!

Tahmin x

Starting University…

Starting University…

Hello people!

So you might know that I have recently started Uni, I’m very much still a ‘fresher’. You know its only been about 3 and a bit weeks so I’m trying to adjust and adapt to this new lifestyle.

I have to say that I’m not quite liking it as much as I’ve enjoyed Sixth Form- I don’t think anything will beat that 😦 #missit. But it is still an experience.

I really enjoyed Freshers Week which is where I basically signed up to a ton of societies (about 17 to be precise) but have only attended about 1 of them LOL. Anyways this is where I met quite a lot of people; everybody was just so bubbly that it was easy to meet people. I actually met two really nice people here as well, I won’t state heir name just in case! Also during this time I was getting the hang of commuting for 1hour and 15 minutes! Yes, it’s a very long time, I hope it’s worth it in the end.

Furthermore, I’ve also been adapting to the different style of learning. The lectures, seminars, reading packs and a lot o independent work. Luckily, however, it means I get a lot of time to do other things, such as work, write blog posts and just relax a little bit. Which is what I need considering last year.

But yh that’s my Uni life so far, I do expect it to become a bit busier obviously as our first assignment is approaching. But nonetheless, I hope I continue to enjoy the course.

Thanks for reading, Tahmin x

My A-Level Results!

My A-Level Results!

Hello to anyone who has still stuck by me!

It has been ages, and I know, I say that to literally every single post. To be fair though- I’ve been quite busy!

A week before Results Day:

So it is a few days before Results Day and believe it or not, I actually didn’t really pay attention to it during the day. It was only once I lay in bed at night that all the fears and worries suddenly came over me. All the butterflies and stomach pains and nausea. But that was only because I organised myslef to be extremely busy during the days coming up to ‘Doomsday’. One thing I did was ask my manager for more shifts at work- I mean seriously, working in Retail definitely restricts you from thinking about anything apart from “Oh no, did I give that lady the correct change?!”. (Yes, I’m absolutely terrible at maths). I also had a few days out and about, such as me and my sisters going out to eat dinner. Oh, and the most effective way was by booking my Theory test for 2 days before Results Day!! That was definitely a really good way to get my mind wandering elsewhere as I had so much revision and preparation to do.

Morning of Results Day:

Oh, lord, the morning of. I woke up, threw some clothes on, put the teeniest amount of make- up on and ran out the house. I was literally petrified. I tried, tried my hardest to not think about it, but, uh that’s quite impossible. Oh and before I left, I gave a really cute message to my lovely sister who was also getting her results. Anyways, I was about 10 minutes early (8:20am) and so the school gates were locked. This was probably the worst part as it meant that I was just standing outside the building peeping into the school which held my fate. Literally. It was sort of laughing at me… And also, as more and more people started to turn up, I heard more and more stories. “Yes, I checked UCAS , and I’ve got in!” “I’ve been put through to clearing” “Me too”. Eventually however it turned 8:30 am and me and my bestest friend enetered, terrified of what will happen.

Opening my results:

So….it was finally the time to open it and I remember it so well. Before I did open it thoug, I told my friend to ‘skrrr’ over to the other other side LOL. Anyways I slowly peeled off the sticky part of the envelope and really, really slowly pulled out the paper. And whilst making a little prayer I read my FATE.

My reaction:

At first I was really relieved at what I got. Then I got an over-pouring sense of pride and content looking at my English Literature and Biology results.  If you know me, you’d know how much I struggled with these two subjects, admittedly I wasn’t the best in them which is why I had such a low self-esteem and genuinly did think I’d fail at least one of them. Like literally, I told every single person I knew to be prepared if I failed, I didn’t want it to come as a surprise!! Seriously though, it was the hardest year of my life, I dedicated my whole year to revising so damn hard for it, especially for Biology. And so I was ecstatic that I got a B for both!!!! That may not be the best but it certainly was for me, I literally couldn’t be prouder of myself. Alhamdulillah x100000. And to top it off, I found out that I was 1 mark off an A in Biology…I mean, this is my biggest achievement in life by far. As I know how hard I worked for it. So anyways after all these crazy emotions, I also felt a little bit disappointed, maybe even shocked. As my grade for Sociology wasn’t what I expected. Not to toot my own horn but I was doing extremely well for the whole two years in Sociology, making me the “Queen of Sociology” in Sixth Form! But my real results didn’t correspond to that at all. I got a B. I spoke to my teacher about my disappointment and she simply said “sometimes exams don’t always reflect your true potential, but it’s fine because I know you’re a great Sociologist”. That’s what I’ve been keeping in mind, because it’s true. I know what I’m capable of and sometimes exams don’t always bring out the best in you. I believe that I spent a lot of time focusing on the other two subjects that I sort of neglected Sociology which lled to my grade slipping a bit. But it’s all good.

After opening results:

If you made it this far, AWESOME!

I hope you’ve enjoyed reading this quite personal story which I went in-depth with, I’ve really enjoyed going through the day all over again. I also forgot to mention that my friends all done really well, I didn’t hear any crying so that’s a good sign! My best friends passed with flying colours and the head teacher took some real cute pics of us (which I didn’t get to see!?). And I ended the day giving a few teachers good-bye hugs and giving all of them farewell (and personalised) cards.

Anyways, till next time, Tahmin x

Revolution Eyeshadow Palette worth the hype?

Revolution Eyeshadow Palette worth the hype?

Read my last post here!

Hello everyone, well hello to anyone who has stuck by me 😀 I’m aware that I haven’t blogged in literally ages, ages. But I’ve had a lot going on, again, which I will update you all on in a while!

So I’ve been planning to review some products I’ve been trying out for a while. One of them being my birthday present- the Revolution eyeshadow palette. I’ve been hearing good reviews of this so I’ve been excited to give it a chance myself.

First impression:

I thought the colours are absolutely beautiful! So up my street. I’ve been hunting down orange-y colours for a while as I think they look beautiful. Apart from that all the other colours look beautiful too, the pinky-browny-champagne colours are my absolute fav. Therefore I was really excited. Oh and there are a lot of colours that come with this which is a bonus.

What I’ve learnt:

I’ve trialled with this palette a few times now and I’ve realised that the colours are surprisingly pigmented. They also blend really nicely. In addition to that, the texture of all of them is really cream, almost buttery which surprised me as well. However the orangey – pink colours which I was so looking forward to doesn’t actually look orange on my eyelids, it is more pink than anything, which was disappointing. Also I realised that the colours wear off much more than my trusty Sleek eyeshadow palette.

Overall: 

overall I would say that this palette is a good palette for giving a large number of beautiful colours for only £8, as well as it feeling lovely and light in the lids. However I would say the Sleek palettes have a higher quality as they are even more pigmented and are much more long-lasting. I’d give it a 6.5/10

Thanks for sticking by me!

See you again soon, Tahmin x

My mid-life crisis at 17

My mid-life crisis at 17

Helloooo

It has been quite a while since my last post, but I can explain. THE EXAMS. THE AWFUL EXAMS.

My problems:

That’s right, I’ve been sitting my A2 exams which dictate the course of the rest of my life! Let me tell you that it has not been easy. Whats really bad is that couple of weeks before my exams I would have nervous breakdown nearly everyday. I just lacked a lot of self-confidence as the grades I had in some subjects were not the ones I wanted (needed) in the end. Many things were getting to me. I didn’t get a place in a university which was the only ‘Russel group’ uni I had for my course which definitely did hurt me. I mean looking around, nearly all of my friends had a place in one of the top unis whilst I didn’t. I also thought that even if I do get into Uni with the reduced offers, it will stop me from getting into a good job later on. As surely employers care what you get in A-Levels. This made me really nervous, ‘so what if I get into this Uni, I definitely wont get a good job’. I also began dwelling on something which I had tried to push to the back of my head; ‘why did i chose these subjects? why did i not try so hard for Biology in AS?’. Unfortunately these questions kept popping up, day and night, at school and at home. It was the worst.

What I did to get help:

I knew all this was toxic and meant that as a result, the quality of my work and revision just went down even further. I had no determination to revise as I thought ‘whats the point?’. But I knew this was the wrong way to go, not now, not after the whole year of working so hard. And so I decided to get help. I wanted to talk to people about it. This was continuously said to me by my friends, they knew I was going through a tough time so kept telling me to talk about it instead of bottling it all up. So that’s what I did. Luckily I have a virtual mentor for support and so I poured my heart out to her. This was much better for me to do as I find it difficult to express myself face-to-face because I know I’ll just break down. She gave me a lot of advice to handle the situation. As well as some other people; my sisters, parents, teachers, friends, my religion.

  • break up my revision into smaller sections- have a revision timetable
  • reward yourself more often
  • instead of saying ‘I wish’ say ‘I can’ – look to the future, don’t dwell on the past
  • know that A-Levels isn’t everything
  • The skills and experience is more valued
  • Enjoy what you are studying
  • HAVE CONFIDENCE!

I can’t say that I’m 100% confident in myself yet. But that’s expected as a student. I’m not entirely sure that I will get the grades I’m hoping for but I do know that I have given it everything. So if I wasn’t destined to get a good grade in Biology, then that’s fine. I have just my faith into Allah, I’m a strong believer of everything happening for a reason.

Thank you for reading this, I hope it has given you some tips if you see yourself going through the same phase that I went through. Just know that you are not alone and it isn’t the end of the world. If I can get through it then anyone can.

Yay, 2 exams left!!!